My love affair that lasted a complete Full moon cycle.

Yes, I had my first boyfriend and it lasted 29.5 days. My lover was an Aquarius, the same full moon our affair blossomed under. His name will remain anonymous so I will refer to him as Aquarius.

 

“The Full Moon in Aquarius on August 18, 2016, is our teacher to lift us beyond the personal, emotional realms and point us toward the farther reaches of consciousness. Aquarius helps us see a bigger picture, to value the freedom to experiment with all manner of behavior, expression and lifestyle; extend that experimental attitude forward to others believing all beings should enjoy the freedom and self-governance to walk their own chosen path.” www.mysticmamma.com

 

Aquarius was currently living in San Diego with hopes of moving to LA in the winter. Of course, after witnessing our connection, hopes led to reality. The day finally arrived, I was going to officially meet the man of my dreams. I was kind of a mess, my friends said I was acting like it was my wedding day – I felt like I was meeting my future husband! My heart exploded after reading his text: “babe I’m here.” I nervously walked outside where he was standing under my magnolia trees.

I’ll never forget that first hug. I felt complete comfort, I felt home. Later that night we danced in my tree house, showering each other with unconditional love. It was my first time dating someone trans, I’ve only been with heterosexual males with penises, so I was nervous to experience a vagina for the first time in my life besides my own. He was patient and

understanding but also confidant and loved who he was which turned me on. A week of kissing left me thirsty for more so I went for it, I took charge and went down on him, I was so nervous but so excited to please him. I was intrigued, excited and surprisingly aroused. Seeing the pleasure on his face encouraged me to be open minded and loving, he was a beautiful reflection of me and my community.

Eventually I couldn’t get enough of him, I wanted to be all up in that – all day, every day! He was everything I dreamed of, he was confident, proud and affectionate. We held hands at the market, we cuddled at the movies. I was so grateful, so happy, nothing else mattered.

As the clouds settled around the crescent moon, I started noticing his quick shifts in energy. I started feeling overwhelmed by his direct and forceful input regarding my career and lifestyle. Was this something I could ignore? Could we grow from this? Sometimes we are poised to receive information that alters the way we view the world, our relationships, and ourselves. Aquarius quickly became my comfort, his own trans experience calming my greatest insecurities. It was the perfect reflection. As the Aquarius moon was coming to an end so was his patience with me. I couldn’t keep up with his tense, direct conversations – his demands were drawing me into the shadows and revealing the darker side of the truth. I couldn’t keep up and I felt trapped. I no longer could see the facts from a more universal perspective.

All I wanted to do is break free from him and apply my energy to a higher cause. I wanted freedom to express my feelings more openly and not be afraid of his reaction. My lifelong pursuit of spiritual meaning was reinvigorated and I could see that the cosmos was trying to deliver me an inspirational message: Get out, don’t be your past, don’t settle for harsh, abrasive energy. A head full of fears has no space for dreams.

As the moon cycle came to an end, so did our relationship. This love affair in the powerful Aquarius moon cycle has taught me so much. I can’t describe in words how much this boy means to me, I am so grateful for his energy and the experiences he brought into my life. I leave more open minded and passionate about the trans community, I leave more inspired to be myself and embrace my authentic self. I leave excited for a new beginning – a new moon cycle which so happens to be in my sign, Pisces.

 

“What lies in the shadow or beneath the surface can be set free.  Full Moon in Pisces drawing out wounds from the past to reveal the treasure and the wisdom they hold… Out of the wound emerges the teacher, your wisdom, your wholeness. This Pisces Full Moon eclipse is here to dissolve what holds you apart from Spirit and your true Self.” www.mysticmamma.com